I would not take this bet.
this post was submitted on 12 Sep 2024
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Inventory is stored in the cubes
This is one of those movies I will only learn about through memes.
ive experienced this effect with the movie titanic
never seen it, know the entire plot through memes/parody
Titanic is actually worth a watch though. Whereas for Minecraft, I found even the teaser to be a challenge.
Maybe I'm in a minority, but I thought Titanic was a bunch of melodramatic crap when there were more interesting true stories that the movie could have been about.
That's fair. But it's worth watching even just for the effects and set work.
I guess I'm one of those people who would rather watch a low-budget movie with a good story than a big-budget movie with a lot of spectacle but a bad story. But I do understand people going to see a movie just for the spectacle. I've done it before. I just usually regret it.
I think it is a kind of spectacle that just doesn't exist anymore. For example, going to a Marvel movie for the effects is sort of like watching a video game. When everything is pure CGI, it loses the appeal (for me).
But Titanic was right at the cusp of that. There is CGI, but there's also bigatures and miniature work and practical effects, etc etc etc. In many ways it is James Cameron at his peak.
But totally agree that the plot is pretty corny and it could have been much better as a more historically-focused film which didn't spend most of the time on a relatively generic love story.
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I just watched the trailer. Jesus Christ that looks awful.
Minecraft just seems like the type of movie where lines like, "Were gonna rock our blocks off!" And that will be their peak writing.
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Titanic is fantastic. You watch the movie completely ready for the ship to crash. But at some point, your brain stops and you're more invested in the characters. Then boom, motherfucking iceberg.
True Lies, another James Cameron movie, does that twist too. Where you watch it for one thing, then surprise, you're now invested in another thing.
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I was thinking about this recently. There's a lot of bad movies that come out every year since forever. Usually, they just kind of disappear and die.
But only thanks to social media have we had a way to mock the studio.
I'm just imagining the memes made of bad movies from the 2000s.
Back then you had to wait for the SNL or MAD skit or Weird Al to make a song.
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Sufficient
Surely they're his blocks
"Oof. Right in the blocks"
"What a load of absolute blocks"
"It's the dog's blocks"
Camera zoom into extreme closeup. "oh... blocks".
Yep, that's the one.
Cubic warming is getting out of hand, I swear! I'm sweating my blocks off.
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Only in the British version.
truly the low hanging fruit of a joke
Whoever wrote it should get the sack.
Eh, don't get twisted up about it. They took a crack at it, that's what counts. Some times you have to feel around for the right joke.
Certainly nut the most creative joke
You guys are testiN my patience.
BALLS
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Everything in Minecraft is cubes so expect the cube humor. Testicles are particularly humorous so I have confidence in this prediction.
I could go either way on this one. There's no great cache of lore to betray, and everybody already sort of plays Minecraft how they want. It actually could work as a fairly generic but charming Jumanji clone.
It could also suck donkey cubes. I'm just saying the licensed IP isn't really going to make or break this one.
The few bits of lore that exist are probably going to be fumbled. I really do hope they do just have herobrine in the background of some scene. The trailer looks like they are going all in on hoglins, which I'm completely meh on. Endermen are probably too scary for a little kid movie tho.
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Naw, it'll just play a metal-hitting-metal sound effect, he'll brief make eye contact with the camera, give a little smirk, and the scene will continue with no further acknowledgement.
Probably a pixelation joke too for nudity that the kids won't get but the adults will.
Look at the brass cubes on this guy!
We're really achieving the prophecy that is Idiocracy.
Idiocracy is the 1984 for film nerds
On the bright side we do end up with president Camacho in that timeline.
At least Camacho was smart enough to listen to the world's smartest person's advice.
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Sounds too close to pubes so they may say blocks instead
I think you are being too optimistic.......
Remember when JB said, "I blacked out. Did something important happen?" in borderlands.
Me either, but he did, and we're gonna get that joke again too.
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Dunno why people would criticize Black’s characters in film. I mean, that’s what he does. Same as Sandler, Ferrell, or any of the rest of the low hanging fruit, cringe, or bro-humor comedy actors. I wouldn’t go to a movie with Jack Black in it and expect Shawshank Redemption.
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