Neurodivergence

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All things neurodivergent and relating to the broader neurodivergent community (and communities).

See also this community's sister subs Feminism, LGBTQ+, Disability, and POC

This community's icon was made by Aaron Schneider, under the CC-BY-NC-SA 4.0 license.

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Parenting a Neurodivergent child (beehaw.org)

submitted 1 year ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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Who here is parenting an ND child?

Has finding out their diagnosis also led to you or their other parent to a late diagnosis?

Any resources you'd like to share with the community?

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[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 year ago (2 children)

@Zumbador @TechyDad @neamhsplach A lot of it may boil down to this:

Was #ActuallyAutistic a label chosen *by* you, as a result of accurate and compassionately-communicated information?

Or was it chosen *for* you, by people who were more interested in trying to “solve the problem” that is you, and are ultimately not motivated by acting for your own well-being?

(I spent most of my life in the second camp, and even on the best days, the term “autistic” is emotionally fraught for me.)

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

For me, it was traumatic in the short term, but liberating in the long term and I chose it for myself.

In the short term, it was traumatic because it meant everything I thought I knew about myself was wrong. When you get to your 30's, you have a pretty set in stone view of who you are and why you do things. Realizing that I'm autistic shattered that self view. Suddenly, reasons why I thought I did many things were wrong and were replaced by other reasons.

This was traumatic, but I eventually (over a few months) rebuilt my sense of self to include autism. This rebuilt sense of self was stronger than before. Thus, the short term trauma led to longer term benefits for me.

Would I want to go through this sense of self shattering again? No, but I'm glad I went through it then.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

@dpnash

Very true. And definitely something late realised autistic people are often not aware of.

But I meant to ask a different question, which is why people in the first group (realising they're autistic vs having been diagnosed by someone else ) sometimes have such different experiences.

@TechyDad @neamhsplach