Please see a therapist. Please. You deserve it, need it, as do your children need from you. It's time to start to heal bro. Love to you & yours.
This should be pinned at the top.
I live on a cruising sailboat and have bought gear from Sun Electronics in Miami Lakes, Fl a few times.
They'll sell you A panel or pallet after pallet of every conceivable type and manufacturer and power rating. There is no sales tax in Florida on anything having to do with solar power, so that could also save you some money.
Here they have several examples of complete systems to give you an idea / crash course of what's involved.
These are examples, and as you start to learn more about the different components and choices (lead acid vs LifePo4 batteries, or home built or store bought, EV powerwall, etc etc) you'll see your prices change.
I'm not affiliated, just a happy customer.
I'm broken, but I show up and do the work ...
Spotify fucks over artists, stop using it.
Anything by Musk ...
Hang out at the lunch places and smoking spots. Easiest way to get (let) in.
Shopping for a sailboat is about the worst leisure activity the 1st world ever invented.
LibreELEC