this post was submitted on 30 Nov 2023
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toilet humour (lemmy.world)
submitted 10 months ago by eighty to c/memes
 
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[–] [email protected] 98 points 10 months ago (12 children)

PSA: For maximum hygiene, close the lid BEFORE you flush.

[–] [email protected] 70 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (2 children)

closes lid

Sits down

Shits on lid

Flushes

[–] [email protected] 10 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago

My name’s not dunk

[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago

Taking 'Upper decker' to the next level

[–] cor315 11 points 10 months ago (2 children)

But then how am I supposed to look at my poop swirling down the drain?

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[–] [email protected] 48 points 10 months ago (3 children)

Plus if you drop anything in the bathroom and the lid is up it's ending up in the toilet, learned that one morning when I was about to brush my teeth, that's when I became a dedicated kid closer

[–] kn33 63 points 10 months ago (3 children)

dedicated kid closer

"Listen, I just know you're going to love this play set; and what a deal you're getting on it, too!"

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[–] [email protected] 48 points 10 months ago (9 children)

Flushing after closing the lid is actually hygienic.

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[–] [email protected] 47 points 10 months ago (27 children)

I always flush with the lid down. Keeps less in the air.

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[–] jopepa 41 points 10 months ago (3 children)

Plus, it’s more mysterious and potentially surprising.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 10 months ago

Yeah that coworker who never removes his stains loves to make people focus on it.

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[–] [email protected] 32 points 10 months ago (2 children)

If you don't shut the lid before you flush it sends poopoo peee particles flying around the bathroom onto your toothbrush

[–] [email protected] 25 points 10 months ago (4 children)

Mythbusters found it makes virtually no difference, and lid down can actually make particles go further due to the pressure forcing them through a smaller gap.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 10 months ago (2 children)
[–] liztliss 9 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Please look this up for yourself- these responses are sus

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[–] liztliss 6 points 10 months ago (6 children)

What episode was this? I can only find evidence of the opposite of what you're claiming here

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[–] Caesium 28 points 10 months ago

I close the lid because otherwise my cat will drink out of the toilet

[–] rustyriffs 18 points 10 months ago (4 children)

Seat AND lid go down, always, no exceptions. Other than having a fundamental redesign of the entire structure, this is the only correct solution.

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[–] Gabu 15 points 10 months ago

I truly don't understand how this is a thing at all... Takes less than a second to open the lid, why would you not close it by default?

[–] [email protected] 14 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Just automate it and get a Japanese Bidet that opens and closes automatically. Problem solved.

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Get one of those non-slamming lids and it's too easy to knock if down while flushing. It's half closed as you leave the room.

[–] geogle 25 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Only downside is when you're at a friend's place and realize too late that they don't have such an awesome amenity. You end up being the toilet slamming asshole, yet again.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago

I'm feeling déjà vu reading this comment

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[–] Matriks404 12 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Only at 25 I have learned I am supposed to close the lid, no one ever said anything about that before in my life. Now I am always doing it.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 10 months ago

That probably means your parents didn't put it down in the house you grew up in. You would have worked out it was always closed every time you walk in.

So you were never going to learn at home, you did well to work that out at 25

[–] XbSuper 10 points 10 months ago

Not humour, just facts.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 10 months ago

You also are allowed to flush when you put the toilet seat down, as is evidenced in the diagram.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 10 months ago

Yes I always leave it closed if it has a tank

[–] [email protected] 10 points 10 months ago

This is how I needed this dilemma explained to me.

[–] xantoxis 7 points 10 months ago (6 children)

Best reason to close the lid: The things you do in the toilet smell. Lid keeps the smells from spreading.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 10 months ago (4 children)
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[–] ShittyEdits 7 points 10 months ago
[–] Branch_Ranch 5 points 10 months ago

Chair height, elongated bowl for the win.

[–] NoSpiritAnimal 5 points 10 months ago (5 children)

Real pros streamline and take off the seat and lid altogether.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago (1 children)
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