Evidently it really was probably a cucumber? http://artisticlicenseorwhyitrustnoone.blogspot.com/2022/11/bullshit-memes-8-ancient-egyptian.html?m=1

tl;dr - was found with other model food, probably meant to sustain someone in the afterlife

No you see they know it's a cucumber because ancient Egyptian dildos had a compartment for bees so that users could experience a vibration effect.

It was probably used for religious purposes of some sort

The Egyptians weren't always shy, but there do appear to be traces of green paint.

Likely used for ceremonial purposes.

Perhaps it was located next to a pair of model tomatoes

Where are the ‘?’ marks. Is this how people write now.

The Egyptlogists might have some additional context and knowledge that some rando on Twitter might now.

Remember that the idiots in the 19th & 20th centuries uncovering all kinds of Egyptian stuff purposefully damaged inscriptions and art because they prominently showed gasp penises!

There are some people in here who are weirdly obsessed with risking a yeast infection.

I'm the model of a cucumber Egyptian

As we well know all women and men in history that lived together with someone of the same gender were just friends. There are many historical records in which esteemed historians depicted the factual truth of deep friendships. Luckily for the rest of us, those noble seers always knew all context required and bore no prejudices towards anything whatsoever. That is a model cucumber. It even tastes like one.

"Model cucumber? Hell, nah, son. That there's a petrified hunk 'a' dooky."

"Ah man, I ate off that thing!"